Life Is Short

"Life is short, then you die." A friend in high school used to say that all the time and write it on the outside of her notebooks. It was kind of her motto. It may sound depressing to you. But it was real to her. Ironically, she died in a car accident our senior year of high school. Her life was way too short. But there's so much more to her than just that motto. There were reasons she said that. She didn't just make it up for the hell of it. She was hurting. She had things going on in her life that made her feel that way.

You probably think this is going to be all about my friend. It's not. This is about all of us. This is about life being too short. This is about bullying. This is about how we should treat others. You see, I just watched the Netflix series 13 Reasons Why with my almost 15-year old daughter. Yes, you heard me right. I watched it with my daughter because she had already watched it by herself on her phone. When she described it to me, I was upset she watched it. It sounded depressing and too much for a teenager to handle. My daughter said everyone in high school was watching it. I wanted to see what the big deal was and process it with my daughter, so we watched it together. I didn't know how much it would affect me. How much it would affect my daughter. If you haven't seen the show, you should watch it. It addresses some very serious issues our world is facing today. It's a made-up story. But it's not. Sadly, it's all too real. The kind of things that happen in the show happen every day in real life. S In the series, the main character, Hannah Baker kills herself because of the way she's treated in high school. Horrible things happen to her. She made a series of cassette tapes explaining the 13 reasons why she killed herself. There were 13 different people who affected her decision to kill herself. 13 different people who contributed to her death because of the things they did or didn't do when she was alive.

The main point I took from the show is this; how you treat others has a huge impact on them. If you treat them badly, it hurts then deeply. If you stand by and do nothing while watching someone get bullied or mistreated, you are almost as bad as the person doing the bullying. We need to stand up for those who are being bullied or mistreated. This goes for everyone, thoughout our whole lives. Not just high school. We can make a difference in people's lives. Good or bad. Shouldn't we try to make a positive impact? Why treat someone bad? There are a lot of reasons why students bully other students.Usually high school students bully others because they feel insecure and they usually have something going on at home. They're getting abused or being neglected, their family is having financial problems, their parents are getting divorced... the list could go on forever. Instead of turning to others to help them, they lash out  Bullying makes them feel good. It feels good to have power over someone else. There's one other reason kids are bullies: they were raised that way. Their parents are bullies or raised them to think they're better than everyone else so they learn to make fun of everyone who isn't like them. Yes, adults can be bullies too. It happens at work, at public
 events, even within our own families. It happens everywhere. There are times we all say and do things we shouldn't. Things we regret and wish we could take back. But some people take it too far.  Some people don't regret the things they say and do. Some people get high off of making others feel bad.

Why do humans have to hurt each other? Why can't we just love each other and build each other up? That's the way it should be. I know it's unrealistic. We will never have world peace. We will always hurt each other. Let's call it for what it is  Bullying. Emotional and physical abuse. Rape. Murder. It's a sad and scary world. It scares me that this is the world my kids are growing up in. I don't want them corrupted. I don't want them to lose their innocence. I don't want them to get hurt. But that's unrealistic too. We all get hurt. If not physically, at least emotionally. And emotional abuse can scar us more than physical abuse. Both are awful. But physical scars fade quickly. Emotional scars tend to last longer. I don't want any of it for my girls. I don't want it for anyone.

Maybe the world won't change. But maybe we can. One person at a time. We can make a difference in other people's lives. All we have to do is choose to love instead of hate. Choose to build people up instead of tear them down. Choose to be there for others when they're having a hard time. It starts with the ones we already love. Show them that you care. Be there for them. Tell them you appreciate them. Tell them you love them. Do whatever it takes to make them feel good. Because that's what Jesus would do. He loves us unconditionally. He forgives us when we screw up. So why can't we forgive our family, friends, neighbors, even our enemies? Jesus was crucified on a cross. Betrayed by those he loved. Why should He forgive us and love us still? He shouldn't. But He did and He still does. Every day. We just have to ask for forgiveness. And forgive others like he forgives us. I know; it's easier said than done. Believe me, I struggle with it. There are many people who I've been hurt by that I didn't want to forgive. It has taken me a long time to get there. And I'm still not sure I've completely forgiven some of them. But I'm working on it.

After we start with our family and friends, we should also start loving people we don't know. Yes, we should love complete strangers. That doesn't mean going up and giving random people hugs (but that would be a nice thing to do). It means showing kindness by smiling at them, asking how they're doing, thanking them if they help you with something. Restaurant servers, doctors/nurses, store clerks, even people on the streets. The list could go on. Sometimes just a smile or a few kind words can make that person's day. Once I found out the person serving me at the drive-thru was having a birthday. I told him happy birthday, and gave him a huge smile. His face lit up and he said I made his day. Another time I paid for someone's food at the drive-thru. I looked and the people in the car behind me were waving and had the biggest smile on their faces. When I'm in the checkout line at the grocery store, I always ask my cashiers how they're doing and try to engage them in conversation. I saw a homeless man and gave him food. He was so touched, he said, "God bless you." I saw a homeless woman and instead of looking the other way or saying I was too busy, I went up and talked to her. Asked her story and listened. I prayed for her and gave her a hug. I also gave her my number and told her to call me anytime. I always try to show that I genuinely care. You never know how much something you say or do will have an impact on someone. It's called random acts of kindness. Try it sometime. I promise it will effect both the person you're showing kindness to and yourself in a positive way. In the Bible, Jesus loved complete strangers and He loves us ALL today. No matter who we are or what we've done. We are all His children. We should show others His love. Especially those who may not know Him. We all need love. Be the love that others need. And allow others to love you back.

We should also strive to make a bigger impact on the world. Random acts of kindness are wonderful. But what else are we doing to help change the world? Get involved. Pray for others. And don't just say a quick prayer and forget it. Pray every day for the same people over and over until things get better for them. God hears our prayers. Keep adding to your prayer list. Never stop. Donate to charity. Sponsor a child. Get involved in school and church activities. Volunteer your time. Volunteer your skills, whatever they may be. I'm a photographer and I've volunteered to take photos for free. I don't do it all the time, because I still have to make a living. But if you know your skill can help others that can't afford to pay, why not do it? Especially for churches, schools, nonprofit organizations... any place that could use your skills to improve the lives of others. We need to get more involved. I know we're all busy. I'm guilty too. I don't get involved as often as I should. But I want to work on it. I want to help others.

Life is always going to be hard. We live in a fallen world. It get scarier everyday. Just watch the news for a few minutes and you'll see. But that's why we have to love others and try to help as much as we can. Don't let the world get you down. Keep pushing forward. Keep loving others. And ask for help when you need it. We're all in pain sometimes and need someone to love us. I know I do. I want to love others and I want them to love me. I want all of us to love more and make a difference. That's what God wants also. Be His hands and feet. None of us are perfect. He just asks us to try. I know I can try. I hope you can too.